Why I’m Not Voting

May 30, 2016 - fall Denim

—There are so many people that it’s only overwhelming—I meant during my garden party, right now. Do we even have adequate hors d’oeuvres? Stacy ate all a salami again! No, we don’t know anything about a candidates.

—I’m fearful that on my approach to a voting counter we will outing and tumble into a reservoir and dash sand onto an trusting passerby, Meryl Streep. She will be on her approach to accept her fourth Oscar and will hatred me forever. we will cry since we adore Meryl.

—My designated polling place is run by my ex-boyfriend, Tad, who once tattooed my name on his face and approaching that we would do a same, with his name on my face. we did not since we hatred needles and also didn’t adore Tad for real. (It is my polling place since we still live with him.)

—Not voting creates me feel reduction bad about a taxes that I’m evading.

—I’m only so busy. we watch during slightest 3 Meryl cinema a week, and we have to go all a approach to a library to lease “It’s Complicated” since online robbery is illegal. Following a minute of a law is really critical to me, nonetheless infrequently we wish that we could have a contend in what a laws are.

—I am a palm model, and we am resting my ethereal digits for an arriving Baby Gap print shoot. we play “Mommy Hand That NEEDS a New Spring Denim Line.”

—My opinion doesn’t even matter. It’s like when we send a write-in list for a Oscars and they respond by saying, “Please stop contacting us” or “For a eighth time, we will not broach this life-size sculpture of we to Meryl Streep.”

—I forgot to vote. we was rapt with gluing rings onto my daughter’s papier-mâché dress of a world Mars. It took me dual whole hours. Then we remembered that Mars does not have rings, and we had to take them all off. That was an additional dual hours. It took so prolonged since we had to work with my feet. (Did we discuss that we am a palm model?)

—One time we saw Meryl Streep and she was not wearing an “I Voted” sticker.

—I hatred all a candidates. One of them we hatred a slightest and indeed arrange of like, though on element we don’t wish any of them to win.

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